STYLETHREAD -- LET'S TALK SHOP!

bex · Chanel

shoes off at a party?

Maat · Kenneth Cole

First of all, congrats on the engagement! Cosmo radio? I'm so jealous! I have XM and they don't have Cosmo radio. :(

This reminds me of the SATC episode where Carrie has her Manolos stolen at that party.

I hate, hate, HATE taking off my shoes at a party. It has nothing to do with dressing around my shoes though. I just hate stepping on stuff and getting my feet dirty. I can deal with it if there is a rug, but my one friend has a rule like this and she has hard wood floors and they aren't even clean! I don't get it!

If you really have a reason to make people take their shoes off, you should let them know ahead of time so they can wear socks.

Lilykind · Hermes

Shoes off. I'm Asian and in my family, it's customary to take your shoes off inside the house. All of my friends are fully aware of this and I've never had anyone object. I keep my floors clean though and I would never have comapny over when they weren't clean.

I do keep all my guests' shoes inside my apartment by the entryway on a shoe rack. I can understand someone not wanting to leave their shoes in the hallway.

AllieGurl · Marc Jacobs

That totally bugs me! That episode of SATC with the stolen shoes is a classic!

My husband and I used to attend a bible study group that required us to take our shoes off. We would be dressed up in suits and nylons and skirts and they would insist we leave our shoes outside by the dogs beds. EWWWW ...

greendiamond · Marc Jacobs

I attended a party once in a shoes-off home, and they had these little slippers in a basket for guests to choose from to wear while visiting. The shoes stayed inside.

It was a casual gathering, so it was okay, but if it were a more formal party, I would have been disappointed/weirded out to take off my shoes. Not only are they part of the outfit, but I'm 5'1" and I am always in heels, so I feel weird when I'm not as tall.

-gd

luckylily · Gucci

My DH and his family are all about shoes off at the door. I think it is really common where they are from because the ground is covered with snow for so much of the year.

I also hate taking my shoes off at the door at other people's homes (especially when it is unexpected). I hate stepping on grimy floors or getting my socks all dirty. Hell, even if the floors are clean, it kind of grosses me out. I also dislike being unprepared for it - either wearing the wrong socks or not having a good pedicure if I'm not wearing socks. Plus my feet get cold really easily.

That said, my take on it is that I totally respect other people's homes, and if they want me to take my shoes off I'm not going to argue. I wouldn't leave most of my shoes in the hallway of an apartment building. I'd have to respectfully ask if I could store them somewhere else.

MissMee · Kate Spade

I don't necessarily mind it, per se, but I think it's kind of annoying when it's just sprung on you at the door instead of knowing in advance. I had it happen last year at a halloween party. The shoes were part of the costume, so taking them off was a little annoying - especially since we didn't know in advance that there was a "no shoes" policy.

At another party, we were told to remove our shoes at the door and I only had on my heels. No socks/hose/tights, so my tootsies froze on the tile floors.

It should definitley be noted in the invite

lynnie · Chanel

I think it should be known beforehand. I've never had to do this for a party. I have a korean friend who I have to take shoes off, but he doesn't have big parties at his place either where I'll have to step on really gross things. I think its better if theres carpet, its a smaller party, and its known in advance- i wouldn't have a problem with it. If theres hard floors, beer sloshing on the ground, etc, hell no, i'd just leave.

Hedvig · Coach

We never wear shoes inside so the thought of guests walking around on our clean wood floors and rugs in their dirty shoes really grosses me out. Considering how filthy NYC sidewalks are (dog poop and cigarette butts, etc.), I would probably have to have all our rugs cleaned afterwards. Just my two cents.

I would never ask anyone to take their shoes off, though. I guess I just assume that the guests immediately notice that no-one else is wearing shoes so they take theirs off without being asked to. That's how it usually goes.

-- Edited by Hedvig at 13:08, 2006-10-10

Kelly · Hermes

Growing up my family always wore our shoes all around the house, so when I was first confronted with taking my shoes off at a friend's house I thought it was kind of weird. I don't even think it happened until college. When I'm at a friend's house, I guess I don't mind a lot although I hate not knowing until the moment of. I wish when someone called me to hang out they would say, "Bring socks in case your feet get cold, because we dont' wear shoes in my house." Just a little heads-up. But I would think it weird if someone was having a party and thought everyone should take their shoes off. It's one thing if I'm hanging out with just a friend or two, but I think that if it gets bigger than a few people it's kind of weird to ask everyone to take their shoes off.

cc · Marc Jacobs

Hedvig wrote:

We never wear shoes inside so the thought of guests walking around on our clean wood floors and rugs in their dirty shoes really grosses me out. Considering how filthy NYC sidewalks are (dog poop and cigarette butts, etc.), I would probably have to have all our rugs cleaned afterwards. Just my two cents.
-- Edited by Hedvig at 13:08, 2006-10-10

Same here. Another factor that I always consider is that if people live in an apartment they may need/want to keep the noise down. As much as I care about fashion I don't get offended if I can't keep my shoes on at a party where no one else is wearing any. If for some reason I'm barefoot and my feet are cold or unpedicured I'll just ask to borrow a pair of socks (assuming I'm friends with the hosts). Of course I'm talking about small or quiet parties. I wouldn't want to take my shoes off at a huge, messy rager but I can't imagine people hosting that sort of party would demand that their guests stay shoeless either.

But like Hedvig, I don't think I've ever asked people to take shoes off when I've hosted a party but I think the majority of my guests have done so automatically.

twinkle · Coach

I HATE when I have to do this at a party or when going to someone's house. I don't think it's an appropriate thing to ask guests to do but that's just my opinion. I do feel differently if it's a cultural thing, but I know people that do it just because they have a new place or have just cleaned their carpets or whatever- I don't think it's right...

Eurodaisy · Dooney & Bourke

twinkle wrote:

I HATE when I have to do this at a party or when going to someone's house. I don't think it's an appropriate thing to ask guests to do but that's just my opinion. I do feel differently if it's a cultural thing, but I know people that do it just because they have a new place or have just cleaned their carpets or whatever- I don't think it's right...

I largely agree with this. Cultural sensitivity is one thing, but come on, it's not like I wear muddy, disgusting shoes into other people's homes on a regular basis. I'm not here to dirty up your place, I'm just responding to an invitation. If you're super-worried, get a doormat. That's what they are for.

I also don't like the way my feet look, I don't get pedicures very often, and I don't like being made to have "naked" feet when I'm not prepared for it. Especially for larger parties, it's most gracious to take your guests as they come, and schedule a carpet-cleaning for afterwards.

jacL · Coach

I don't mind at all being asked to take my shoes off at someone's home if I am coming over for a casual visit. Personally, I prefer shoes off in my own home, but I do not ask people to do it, rather, if they see that I remove my shoes, they will too--and if they don't, no big deal, they are a guest in my home so it is okay.

At parties, though, I do think it is rude to ask people to remove their shoes. You often don't wear socks with your cute party outfits and shoes often make the outfit. At the very least, people asking you to remove your shoes at their party should offer you a pair of clean socks.

nunzi182 · Kate Spade

At formal parties I think it's rude/weird to have people take their shoes off, but if it's a casual thing, I don't see the big deal. Socks are there for a buffer anyway, so if they get a bit dirty from the floor, it's no biggie. When people come to my house they automatically take their shoes off because I have white carpeting (it came that way!) It's nice that they do it out of common courtesy, but I would never make anyone take their shoes off.

cahabo · Kate Spade

I think if someone is worried about their floors, then they shouldn't be inviting guests over. I once went to someone's house and they asked everyone to take our shoes off. I was quite put off by that because I am uncomfortable with my shoes off since my feet get cold easily and their floors were'nt exactly crumb free with all their small children. Asking guests to take their shoes off (unless it is well known before hand) is a major don't! Just clean the darn floors if they get dirty!

kittenheels · Coach

I generally take my shoes off when I'm in the house. I've never asked people to take their shoes off for parties or anything. I think it's interesting to hear all the different views. I just like to pad around in socks most of the time...

littlebean · Kate Spade

This post totally caught my eye because my boyfriend just moved in with someone who is adamantly "shoes off," whereas my boyfriend and I are both firm "shoes on" types! What to do, what to do...

Although I completely respect people who want to have a "shoes off" policy, I have to admit that I really don't like having to take mine off. My feet get quite cold and I also feel embarrassed about the way that they look, so I'm much much more comfortable with my shoes on, assuming that they are clean. Also, two of my friends that have a "shoes off" policy just leave their shoes right in front of the door and I've actually fallen over after tripping on the shoes once! That being said, I try to live by the rules of others when I'm lucky enough to be a guest in their homes.

luckyclover · Dooney & Bourke

AllieGurl wrote:

That episode of SATC with the stolen shoes is a classic!

I was thinking the same thing.