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cat


Marc Jacobs

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Should I be worried?*UpDate*
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I feel maybe I should give some background first. I have been going out with this guy for 5 months now,and we have been friends for 7 months. The only problem I have had so far is that we live two and half hours away from each other.All though we have both a agreed that we don't want anything really serious right now (living together or marriage) we are seeing each other exclusively.   Okay so here is where my concern comes in. I have had this horrible cold for a week and we were supposed to both go out last night with some of his friends for dinner(it was his one friends birthday). Problem is I would have had to drive 3 or so hours to get there and I was in no way up to driving that far feeling so sick,and my bf J couldn't come get me because he was working and would have only had an hour between work and the dinner. So I told him to go ahead with out me.   Anyway I was talking with are mutual friend who was out with them last night and she told me something interesting,I guess they were all making light conversation and the topic got around to who do you have a crush on(celebrities and such). Well I guess when it got to J's friend B's turn she listed some actors but also mentioned J. to which my friend said J responded  " this just made my day,and I kinda feel the same ."   Like WTF? How am I supposed to take that? Was he just being nice not wanting to cause a scene? Or is he really attracted to her?   Also am I making to big a deal of this? And should I say anything to him about it?   Up till now everything has been perfect between us so I am not sure how to take this.  


***See below post for update***



-- Edited by cat at 17:34, 2006-10-10

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Kelly


Hermes

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RE: Should I be worried?
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Oh my gosh! That sucks. I don't know if you should tell him you know that or not. On the one hand, he might get upset that his friends told you that, and he might feel like you two are going behind his back and you're trying to spy on him. Even though you aren't, I could see someone getting to that conclusion if they were already upset. On the other hand, he was totally disrespectful of you to say that. I would definitely be upset. I know it wasn't a huge thing, but I mean if I heard that my boyfriend said that to someone we would have a huge problem. I think you should talk to him about it. It might be awkward for the aforementioned reasons, but if you don't you'll always just be sitting there wondering how he truly feels.

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Farrah


Marc Jacobs

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Ummmm yeah, I would definitely be concerned.   Just ask him about it ASAP so that it doesn't eat at you and potentially spoil any further chance for romance.  Good luck!

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travelgirl


Kate Spade

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Farrah wrote:

Ummmm yeah, I would definitely be concerned.   Just ask him about it ASAP so that it doesn't eat at you and potentially spoil any further chance for romance.  Good luck!

I agree! 

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blubirde


Chanel

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You should definitely ask him about it. I don't care if my BF was being nice, mumbling, or whatever, I'd be pissed if he said that about another girl who actually ran in his circle. Oh no, he didn't! He can say what he wants to say about celebrities, random girls on tv, etc., but when it comes to real life situations, he'd better a) not have such feelings and b) certainly not voice them. I'm getting all pissed off for you! Yeah, I'd definitely say something to my BF.

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cat


Marc Jacobs

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Thanks girls. It's good to know I'm not overreacting about this. I will talk with him about what he said tonight. I am thinking about just casually mentioning to him that our friend was telling me about the conversations they had and then mention what he said and see what he says.Or something along those lines.


I'll let you know what happens.



-- Edited by cat at 17:46, 2006-10-09

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To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Maat


Kenneth Cole

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Definitely ask him and see how his reaction is. Any kind of defensive is bad. Any accusation of you spying on him or not trusting him is worse. If his reason makes some kind of sense, make sure he understands that saying things like that isn't acceptable if he wants to be with you.

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cat


Marc Jacobs

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Okay so I mentioned it to him last night when we were talking on the phone.


At first he started making the usual excuses: I was drinking,It was late at night.Blah blah blah.
Anyway,one of the first things he said was sorry,and that he never should have said that even though he was trying to be gracious and return her compliment.Apparently he wasn't the only guy there that she mentioned she had a crush on either.
He promised from now on not to say anything that he wouldn't say if I was there.
 
So I have forgiven him ,since I have never had any problems with him before now.
I still feel slightly hurt,but I know his apology was genuine.

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To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.- Ralph Waldo Emerson
blubirde


Chanel

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RE: Should I be worried?*UpDate*
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So his apology was for saying it, not for not meaning it? Ouch. That would definitely hurt my feelings a little bit, too.

But on the bright side, at least he owned up to his mistake and promised not to do it again. We all make mistakes, eh? It takes more balls to admit them than to make them. I hope you feel better soon.

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cat


Marc Jacobs

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blubirde wrote:

So his apology was for saying it, not for not meaning it? Ouch. That would definitely hurt my feelings a little bit, too.

But on the bright side, at least he owned up to his mistake and promised not to do it again. We all make mistakes, eh? It takes more balls to admit them than to make them. I hope you feel better soon.


Yeah he didn't seem to understand that I was upset about him thinking that and not just about him saying it.So I just let that slide.He can be kind of clueless when it comes to women.


Thanks.I'm allready starting to feel a little better about it.


 



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To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.- Ralph Waldo Emerson
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