STYLETHREAD -- LET'S TALK SHOP!

NCshopper · Hermes

Make her stop! (pics included!)

Cortney1982 · Chanel

Just throw all that junk away. Next time she calls, say your not home and will be out all day! If she's calling the house phone (assuming you have caller id) don't pick it up! It's okay to say NO!

luckylily · Gucci

Oh, this really struck a cord with me. My MIL gives us shit every time we see her. She recently moved from a house to a condo and decided she needed to give us all the stuff that no longer fit in her space. Last time they visited she brought us a huge box of crap, including three fuzzy bath mats and fuzzy toilet seat covers sets. Seriously! We only have one bathroom and it already has a bath mat!!

The charity case issue doesn't bother me, I know she's just trying to help her son out. I just don't understand why she thinks we would want these things. Our home is fully decorated, we don't need her old rugs, towels, lamps, etc. It's like instead of making a trip to drop her stuff off at the goodwill, she gives it to us, so that we can then drop it off at goodwill.

If we are at her place, I usually say "Oh, we don't really need that right now. Thanks for the offer" or claim that we don't have room in the car. However, if she brings us something, I pretty much have to accept it and donate to some place later.

As far as the randomly stopping by thing, if she calls I'd tell her that you aren't around. You shouldn't have to adjust your plans for her.

BTW, congrats on your new stuffed cactus. It's a real beauty, gives your bookshelf a nice tex-mex feel.

scarlett · Marc Jacobs

Those two pictures made me laugh out loud! Oh My God. I have a great aunt who does, or used to, do this. She's in assisted living now and unable to drive over with moldy baseball gloves to hand out (once she gave moldy baseball gloves to my cousins, who used to play softball). Once for my grandfather's birthday, she gave him half-used bottles of bug repellant and some cans of Sterno that were so old, the contents had completely evaporated. (Sterno is portable fuel for camping.) In our family everyone made fun of her for this, so that made it a little easier to handle.

Anyway, telling her you're not home is a great idea. Sooner or later that message will get reinforced and she'll stop doing this. And if it doesn't sink in, eventually you could say "Gee, that is so nice of you to offer but we *really* don't have the room for it, we have to say no thank you." If you want to see her socially you could follow that up with a suggestion to get together another time.

AllieGurl · Marc Jacobs

Those pictures are so funny!

My MIL does this to me all the time. She is notorious for "collecting" junk. She has no room in her house so she starts moving it on us.

Last month she gave me an old smelly lace collar in a picture frame. IT WAS SO WEIRD AND CREEPY!

I tell her all the time that I am really picky and dont want anything , this has cut down a bit on the items , but not stopped them.

squishy · Coach

HAH! sorry, but i think it's awesome that you lined up the used spices so nicely to take a picture. and that stuffed cactus is insane. who MAKES THESE THINGS?!

anyway, she doesn't sound like the type to actually honor your wishes entirely. i would try telling her (quite firmly) that you don't have space, don't need extra things or think that relative x might benefit more from her charity. or you could publicly re-regift her regift to a mutual acquaintance/relative as a stunt ("here mom! a stuffed cactus and holocaust dvd! i knew you always wanted these"). either that, or i could go through my mother/father, since they're on equal age-footing and could say things you would find uncomfortable explaining.

and regarding her randomly dropping in, my passive-aggressive way would be to screen her calls and 'not be home' when she insists on imposing herself on you.

-- Edited by squishy at 01:39, 2006-09-03

FashionPrincess · Hermes

No addition suggestions on the whole aunt situation, but you totally need to ebay that catus thing, that could make a very funny listing and it'd be funny to see what someone would pay for a family heirloom stuffed catus

carmenb513 · Coach

ok.........I don't have any suggestions about the looney aunt- I personally would have to tell her to keep her junk, however it's not always that eas.

I will say though that today I was kinda sad, and feeling down and reading this post+ everyone's comments made laugh my ass off.I needed that! I hope you don't mind!

carmenb513 · Coach

luckylily wrote:

BTW, congrats on your new stuffed cactus. It's a real beauty, gives your bookshelf a nice tex-mex feel.

ROFLMAO!

ejc423 · Coach

Doesn't hotcocoa collect weird plush things?

NCshopper · Hermes

Thanks for your suggestions ladies! I'll just tell her in the future that we won't be at home when she stops by.

I have to say though, that I am SOOOOOOO keeping the stuffed cactus. I'm thinking that someday when we have kids, we'll hide the thing and make the kids go Stuffed Cactus hunting instead of Easter Egg hunting. DH and I realized it can also substitue for: a Christmas tree, a stuffed animal, a table centerpiece, a loofa, part of a Halloween costume, a really big pin cushion, or a doorstop. Oh, the possibilities! Of course, for the office, it can be used as a stress cactus. Any other suggestions are welcome.

And, here's another visual treat for you guys. This was a Christmas present from said aunt this past Christmas. We call it Creepy Hand Thing:

carmenb513 · Coach

YOU'RE JOKING....RIGHT?

scarlett · Marc Jacobs

That is one of the ugliest things I've ever seen!!!

I'm curious -- did your aunt explain how this stuffed cactus became a family heirloom? Or who it first belonged to?

kittenheels · Coach

I can empathize completely. I have, bless her and keep her, a Crazy Aunt _____. She is all sorts of good, kind and generous, but she does crap like that all the time. She travels frequently, and brings home the worst sort of knicknacks every. And then gives them to us. Every year in college, she would give me tons and tons of towels. We decided that she could not resist a sale, even if she didn't actually need anything...so she would buy stuff and then dole it out as gifts...regardless of whether we needed things or not :).

So, my mother and I just laugh...and we all embrace the gifts...and then throw them right out :)

I would keep the cactus, though, it's the finest I've ever seen!

luckylily · Gucci

kittenheels wrote:

Every year in college, she would give me tons and tons of towels.

LOL! My Mom's motto in life and gift giving is "People can always use towels." She gets EVERYONE towels for every occassion, and she is always so pleased with herself when they open up their box of towels. It used to annoy me because towels are NOT a fun gift, IMO, but now I think it is kind of funny.

That creepy hand thing is one of the craziest things I've ever seen. If I stumbled upon it in the dark, I'd probably start crying and wet my pants.

Dizzy · Marc Jacobs

Bwaaahhhhhhahhahahhahahhahhahhaa! Oh my god. This is the funniest thing ever.

shopgirl · Kenneth Cole

absolutely hilarious. sounds like she's lonely and is trying to help out. that glove is bloody scary.

Lilykind · Hermes

I think you and your DH are handling the situation really well.

I LOVE the pictures. I haven't seen some of that packaging since 1988.

ejc423: I do believe you're right about hotcocoa...and I think dot does as well.

squishy · Coach

NCshopper wrote:

Of course, for the office, it can be used as a stress cactus.

HAHA! genius!!

and i have no words for that hand. that hand is just plain creepy.

sephorablue · Marc Jacobs

I literally almost spat my dinner out all over the computer when I saw the Creepy Hand Thing! Wahahahahaaaaaaaaaa.

I don't know if you've ever read John Irving's Hotel New Hampshire, but your ideas for the stuffed cactus remind me of it. One of the kids in the main family dabbles in taxidermy, and at one point, after the family dog dies, he stuffs it. Hilarity ensues. The family members all take turns passing the dog off to one another and leaving it in each other's rooms so when the unsuspecting target returns and turns on the light, he screams in fright at the sight of the nightmare beast perched on his bed, or whatever.