STYLETHREAD -- LET'S TALK SHOP!

Metric · Gucci

getting hit on...by a chick

Kitty · Hermes

Yes. I got hit on once by a girl during a violent femme's concert. At first I didn't even realize what was happening because I was totally caught off guard. This girl was standing next to me in the crowd and started talking to me - I just thought she was being really friendly/chatty - then she put her arm around me. Then she started whispering in my ear.

I ended up saying I had to go to the bathroom and grabbed my other friend and we just hung out in a different part of the club. Probably not the most mature approach, but I was totally shocked when it happened and that was my immediate reaction.

lovelygirl · Kenneth Cole

I was at a lounge a couple years ago with some friends when this woman comes up to our table out of nowhere and grabs my hand. She looks down at me and coos, "Are you Arabian? Because I looooooove Arabian women-- they are so hot"

Needless to say, I was a little alarmed. I just murmured something about not being Arabian and went to the restroom. Not so smooth on my part but it was just so bizarre and I really didn't know how to respond.

scarlett · Marc Jacobs

Only once -- about 6 years ago, I was out dancing with my cousins (all girls) and this other girl came up, I thought just to join us. Maybe she thought I was gay because I was with all girls, I don't know, but she didn't say anything to me -- she just started dancing behind me and then, well, felt me up. I kind of yelped in shock and she left, probably realizing I wasn't going for it.

sephorablue · Marc Jacobs

wow, these stories are crazy... and metric, you're totally right--no guy could pull any of these manouvers without getting punched in the face! In fact I think I might try to punch ANYONE who felt me up, man OR woman! It's so strange to me, though, that women would behave so boldly when they have no reason to think that their target is even inclined to respond. Obviously it's one thing to be that aggressive when you know the person you're hitting on is of a sexual orientation that's favorable to you, but if you're just shooting in the dark? Seems like you run a good chance of embarrassing yourself and the other person.

Dizzy · Marc Jacobs

Yeah, every once in a while. I think women HAVE to be more agressive because they don't know who's gay, or who they may talk into experimenting for the night...

Personally, I've found that they are much better at being playful than men, even while being agressive, and I never feel threatened. Whereas when a guy comes on strong and refuses to accept my "no" signals, I get scared because I don't know how far it's going to go...

scarlett · Marc Jacobs

sephorablue wrote:

wow, these stories are crazy... and metric, you're totally right--no guy could pull any of these manouvers without getting punched in the face! In fact I think I might try to punch ANYONE who felt me up, man OR woman!

I totally wish I had done something besides just yelping like an idiot, but I was so shocked it basically stunned me for a moment! I agree that if a man did that he would be more likely to get slapped, punched, etc. Hopefully now I would possess the coolness of mind to do something else.

NCshopper · Hermes

My guess is that women probably have to be more aggressive so their intentions are clear. (I recognize that that's probably a sweeping generalization.) But I'm thinking if a woman was hitting on me really subtly, I'm so oblivious that I think I'd totally mistake that for just someone being friendly.

AllieGurl · Marc Jacobs

A few years ago I was at work and a women who I had worked with for sometime invited me out to dinner. I thought nothing of it , thought it might be fun. So I called my hubby and told him I was going to dinner with a coworker and would be home a bit later.

So we get to the resturant and she starts asking me really weird questions. Did I like being married? What was sex like with a man? etc. So I say " So I take it you a lesbian" and she says "well yeah, I am really into you and thought you could tell."

I was REALLY embarresed. I honestly didnt know what to say. After a few akward moments she says "so I take it you are interested it hooking up?" I just started laughing. I didnt mean to be rude, but it was so funny. I felt so dumb.

I told her politly that I was very happily married and not interested in women. Finished dinner Fast and took off ...

Aurora · Marc Jacobs

scarlett wrote:

Only once -- about 6 years ago, I was out dancing with my cousins (all girls) and this other girl came up, I thought just to join us. Maybe she thought I was gay because I was with all girls, I don't know, but she didn't say anything to me -- she just started dancing behind me and then, well, felt me up. I kind of yelped in shock and she left, probably realizing I wasn't going for it.

Don't feel bad scarlett. I would have yelped too if that was me.

luckyclover · Dooney & Bourke

scarlett wrote:

Only once -- about 6 years ago, I was out dancing with my cousins (all girls) and this other girl came up, I thought just to join us. Maybe she thought I was gay because I was with all girls, I don't know, but she didn't say anything to me -- she just started dancing behind me and then, well, felt me up. I kind of yelped in shock and she left, probably realizing I wasn't going for it.

Omg that's just crazy! I've been hit on but nothing that serious. We were at a strip club (guys and gals) and the girls always come over and talk to us no matter which club we go to. One of the girls kept coming back over and talking to me. She invited me to come watch her mudwrestle at a different club later and maybe even mudwrestle with her. We didn't go but DH thought it was really amusing.

stardemi · Nine West

One time I joined a few of my lesbian friends at a gay club for a night of fun. Anyhow, this girl comes up to us and starts dancing with me. I figured, what the hell, this doesn't really creep me out 'cause I'm here to have a good time with the people I care about. Anyway, she asks if I have a boyfriend (so I guess it was obvious I wasn't gay) and when I told her "yes" she continues to dance with me. Then, I ask her if she has a boyfriend and she says "yes". So I figure she's out to have a good time to. Turns out her boyfriend had chosen me from all the girls in the crowd as a possible person to have a threesome with. I was so disgusted and somewhat appaled that a stranger would be so forward in saying, "hey, wanna get together with my boyfriend and me- he can watch for a while". Other than that, I just get the occasional smile and head turn. Nothing serious. It never ceases to make my boyfriend jealous though, which makes me smile 'cause he knows he's got everything I could ever want and why the hell would I trade him for a woman?!

scarlett · Marc Jacobs

Aurora wrote:

scarlett wrote:

Only once -- about 6 years ago, I was out dancing with my cousins (all girls) and this other girl came up, I thought just to join us. Maybe she thought I was gay because I was with all girls, I don't know, but she didn't say anything to me -- she just started dancing behind me and then, well, felt me up. I kind of yelped in shock and she left, probably realizing I wasn't going for it.

Don't feel bad scarlett. I would have yelped too if that was me.

thanks, aurora.

these stories are insane! it blows my mind how forward people can be.

Kelly · Hermes

oh my gosh. I was reading this post the other day and I couldn't decide how I would react if this happened to me. I found out on Thursday. I was at this party and there was a lesbian girl. We were just hanging out and talking with a few people in the kitchen, when this one guy started making remarks that made me uncomfortable. Obviously I've been dealing with guys my whole life, so I said everything I usually say to tell him that I'm uncomfortable and uninterested, etc. But then the girl started making some really inappropriate comments, too - and I had no idea how to react. I don't know why it was different for me with the girl, because I know exactly how to react if a guy hits on me and I don't appreicate it. But because she was a girl, I just kind of froze and nervously mumbled things about how I wasn't interested. She kept trying to tell me why dating a girl is so much better, and how she could please me so much better in bed. (There was a bit of alchohol involved. But not a lot - I think she had only had two drinks, if that!) I started getting really uncomfortable and I didn't know what to say, so I just got up to leave the room. But when I did, both she and the guy started making comments about my butt.

Basically I just avoided them for the rest of the night. But then my boyfriend called, and I ducked into an empty room to talk to him for a minute, and she came in and was saying things about how she wanted to get with me, etc., while he could hear. Obviously he's not worried about a girl stealing me away, but it was still really awkward, you know?