My coworker (my supervisor actually) always comments on my shoes. It started out with you have cute shoes but her comments have moved to how many shoes I have. Every time I wear a new pair of shoes, she asks if they are new. I don't know why this bothers me so much. I don't have THAT many shoes however, I wear more than her standard black or brown that she wears everyday. Today, she made a comment comparing me to Imelda Marcos (wife the Philipine dictator who had thousands of shoes). I've actually gotten to the point where I won't wear a new pair of shoes if I know she'll be in the office. It almost makes me feel like I spend too much money on frivilous things although I know she is just joking around with me (she does this with other people, its just part of her personality).
Has anyone else had a similar experience? How do you respond?
my boss says similarthings about my shoes, but I take it as a compliment (which is actually how I'm pretty sure she means it- she's always picking her "favorites"). I did get the feeling once that maybe she thought I spent my money frivilously or whatever, but I'll usually be like "oh I got them at Marshall's!" or something like that (and honestly, I do get a lot of them on sale and at Marshalls). And the other day my eye was bothering me and my contact didn't want to stay in. She saw me rubbing it so I told her what was going on and said that I probably should have worn my glasses, but the prescription is like 5 years old so I can't see all that well with them- but I have more fun things to spend my money on than new glasses. () So hopefully she knows that I'm not in debt or anythng, just sees how I prioritize things a little differently.
My coworkers have recently started to make more and more comments about my style too. When I wear my hair w/a wide headband they'll say "You look like a 50s wife", when I wear my BR argyle cardi "You look like a teacher" and tons of other similar comments. What bothers me the most is that I can't tell whether I should take it as a good or bad compliment. Is looking like a 50s girl a good thing or bad thing to them?? Who cares, but it still bugs me. Sometimes I don't feel like dressing up or am in a rush and don't style my hair and pull it up in a ponytail, and they'll say, "Did you forget to brush your hair?" WTF?? Hmmm...what if I turned the tables on them? I would say, "that shirt makes you look like the Blue's Clues guy", "You must love that cropped jacket...3xs this wk", or "Oops, who did your hair?". That would definetly shut them up, but I just try no ignore it and roll my eyes when I turn away.
Yes this happens to me alot with one co- worker Iam sure she is giving me a compliment but sometime it comes out so blunt and sassy Yesterday we had a staff meeting she walks in and says "Well missy where are you going"? Than she says Hi to another co- worker that was seated on the couch and told her Iam sorry I did not see you there I was blinded by Mrs Pearls. I was wearing a pearl necklace. This is the same co-worker who said I was wasting my money b/c I wanted to join the gym and always making remarks about my weight. Iam sorry I just had to get that out
BQ I feel the same way about wanting to turn the tables on her. Although I did tell her once that I liked my shoes and that was all that mattered and I felt better
This happens to me all the time. I have actually had people take pics of my outfits with their camera phones because they think they are crazy (I think they have plans to use them in our quarterly slide show). They aren't weird, they just aren't typical engineer outfits which is why I think it happens to me.
But, the shoes thing is what I get the most comments on. They ALWAYS ask how much the cost and how many pairs I have. I mainly joke back with them about how I do have a ton of shoes, etc. It does bother me some. Mainly, I wish people would mind their own business. I don't comment to them about how they wear the same freaking shirt every week.
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"Despite all your best intentions, sometimes, fate wins anyway."
My coworkers have recently started to make more and more comments about my style too. When I wear my hair w/a wide headband they'll say "You look like a 50s wife", when I wear my BR argyle cardi "You look like a teacher" and tons of other similar comments. What bothers me the most is that I can't tell whether I should take it as a good or bad compliment. Is looking like a 50s girl a good thing or bad thing to them?? Who cares, but it still bugs me.
BQ just described my coworkers to a T. I always get "you look like..." comments. It makes me feel like I'm wearing a costume or something. On most days I wear one vintage item and I always get "Oh, my grandma had something like that" or "my Mom wore shoes like that in the 70s"
My biggest pet peeve tho is when a bunch of women get together and brag about how they don't iron anything. For some reason that discussion comes up a lot around here. They act like I'm wasting away precious minutes of my life by using an iron now and again. Seriously, the two minutes I spend ironing isn't sucking the pleasure out of my life.
I have one co-worker who grilled me hard-core about all my clothes/bags/shoes. She said something like, "You always have designer stuff and I never see you in the same outfit - how are you affording that?" It's so inappropriate for co-workers to say stuff like that, what business is it of theirs!?!
I think in your situation it is especially inappropriate because this is your supervisor. She's obviosly just jealous or has some insecurity issue or something. Why the hell else would she care? She's trying to make you feel bad about the fact that you're fabulous with many cute pairs of shoes!
I have a sort of similar situation at my work, but not concerning shoes. They (my boss included) think it's ok to ask me personal questions about my purchases. Like, when I got my LV Speedy, I carried it to work. The girls there were making it a big deal (had they never seen one before? ) and one of them said, "So, is it real or fake?" I said it was real, and they continued to look through it -inside and out- to check for authenticity. I mean to ask if it's real I guess I can understand, though I think it's rude, but to inspect the thing? Come on! When they saw the Chanel sunglasses that my bf bought me, a similar thing happened. They asked me how much and where we got them, but not because they were interested in buying some for themselves (or else I totally wouldn't mind). It's like they want to know how I spend my money or something... like it's their business. I usually just say "I got it on sale" or something and try not to let it bother me.
I get comments on my clothes, too, but I don't even listen. Do I really care what the girl whose wardrobe consists of mainly baggy sweatshirts, jeans, and sneakers thinks of my clothes? How about the other girl who wears Old Navy track suits three times a week? Nope
OMG Sandy, I can't believe they inspected your purse to see if it was fake!!
I get comments from co-workers all the time. They know I spend obscene amounts of money shopping, but I don't really have a problem with it, and they are never mean spirited. I am young and I can afford to be frivolous and since most of my co-workers have to support kids they live vicariously through me.
Although I did tell her once that I liked my shoes and that was all that mattered and I felt better -- Edited by kaykay at 22:12, 2006-04-26
Good for you kay kay! I'm glad you said that to her. Some people just feel so insecure about themselves that they have to pick on someone.
A friend of mine was with me and we stopped by my house to pick up something. She followed me in to grab it out of my closet (I stash everything in my closet) no big deal. I keep most of my shoes in the original boxes so they last longer and don't get messed up. So she looks at all the boxes and is like "are there really shoes in all those?" so I tell her there are and she just looks at me in shock. Since then she has mentioned to several people about how many shoes I have......
I hadn't ever thought about it and didn't think I had THAT many....maybe 30? I sold shoes for a department store and got several pairs for under $15 and a few of them for $2.00 (I would have gotten more but they always run out of my small size) That was the best job ever btw
So now this other friend of ours counted her shoes to tell me how many she had and then went and bought more so she could say she has more than me.
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"Thanks to Stephenie Meyer everytime I hear thunder, I imagine vampires playing baseball."
let it roll off. if they actually thought what you were wearing looked bad, they probably wouldn't dare be so rude as to comment on it....well hopefully anyway. sometimes people like to let it be known in not-so-subtle ways that they disapprove of "frivolous" spending on fashion and such, but deep down, they would really like to know what it's like to be you and have some fashion sense, maybe get a fashion makeover, etc.
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"Go either very cheap or very expensive. It's the middle ground that is fashion nowhere." ~ Karl Lagerfeld