STYLETHREAD -- LET'S TALK SHOP!

i started writing a response to this, and then ended up deleting it... this is a really complicated issue for me, b/c in theory i would like to be married. i like the idea of always having someone in your corner. it's funny b/c the moment i realized this was my senior year in college. i went to a dance with a date (normally i'd go stag) and it was nice to always have a dance partner. i feel the same way about marriage.

that being said, i'm really not sure if i'll ever end up married. imo the odds are about 50% and that's on a good day. it's not me being sad or melodramatic, but i think it's the truth. when i was in high school i was like oh i'll focus on school b/c in college i'll meet a guy worth being with (the boys in hs weren't worth being w/). but then i got to college and the guys that i was *supposed* to be with were either lame (had to throw in the old school slang) or didn't want to be with a girl like me. i'm not really going to embellish on that b/c it's too long to get into here. but the short story is in my ethnic group there is a certain standard of beauty, especially among people from certain class backgrounds and i don't fit into that standard. again i'm not going to say "whoa is me" and jump off a building, but at the end of the day realism trumps romanticism for me. suffice it to say, i realize that marriage might not happen for me.

if i do get married i'm going to have a destination wedding on a beach for family and close friends. then just come back and throw a huge party where everyone dances to dawn. that would be the perfect scenario.