STYLETHREAD -- LET'S TALK SHOP!

My husband signed us up for Vonage a few months ago.  If you've checked into it, you know it's a very cheap service.  That's all I know about it other than they SUCK!  Here are my 2 main reasons why:

1.  Every time it rains outside, our phones don't work.  People can call us and leave us VM, but I can't get into the VM box to check it, and the phone doesn't ring in our house.  I only know someone called because the VM light is on.

2.  We had to call 911 yesterday at 4 a.m. because all our fire alarms were going off.  We'd already checked for fire/smoke, but we called the FD via 911 just in case it was carbon monoxide.  Here's where Vonage comes in.......  when I called 911, the call went something like this:

911:  DO YOU NEED POLICE, FIRE, OR AMBULANCE

ME:  FIRE, I GUESS.  THERE'S NO FIRE, BUT MY ALARMS ARE GOING OFF

911:  WHAT STATE ARE YOU IN?

ME:  MASSACHUSETTS

911:  WHAT'S YOUR ZIP CODE?

ME:  WHAT?!  DOESN'T THIS COME UP ON YOUR SCREEN?

911:  YOU'RE ON A (something I didn't know what he said) LINE. WHAT'S YOUR ZIP CODE

ME:  [GAVE ZIP].  GOD, I'M GLAD THERE'S NO FIRE OR WE'D BE OUT OF LUCK

911:  WHAT TOWN ARE YOU IN?

ME:  MY TOWN?????  DID I CALL 911????  THIS IS RIDICULOUS!  I'M IN MANSFIELD.

911:  HOW DO YOU SPELL THAT?

ME: IT'S MANS-FIELD!!!!! MANSFIELD! [THEN I QUICKLY SPELLED IT]

911: I CAN'T FIND ANY ZIP OF [REPEATED BACK WRONG ZIP].  WHAT'S YOUR PHONE NUMBER?

ME: [I CORRECT HIM AND GIVE HIM THE NUMBER].  I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS!  HOW CAN THIS BE 911?  JUST CONNECT ME TO THE GODDAM FIRE DEPARTMENT.  CAN'T YOU HEAR MY ALARMS?

911:  I'M CONNECTING YOUT TO THE FIRE DEPARTMENT.

He then puts me on hold.  (!!!!!!!!!)  I'm listening to a recording saying "You are on hold for 911" over and over again.  Then a lady picks up.  I don't hear how she answers because of my alarms but here's the conversation:

LADY:  [HOWEVER SHE ANSWERED]

ME:  MY FIRE ALARMS ARE GOING OFF.  THERE'S NO FIRE, BUT I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S WRONG.

LADY:  WHAT'S YOUR PHONE NUMBER?

ME:  PHONE NUMBER??!!!!  OH MY GOD, I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS.  IS THIS 911?

LADY:  NO, YOU WERE TRANSFERED TO ME BY THE FIRE DEPARTMENT.

ME: [EXASPERATED GROAN, THEN I DON'T REMEMBER WHAT I SAID, BUT AT SOME POINT I GAVE HER MY ADDRESS]

LADY:  OKAY, I'VE NOTIFIED THE FIRE DEPARTMENT.  THANKS FOR CALLING.  [HANG UP]

At this point, I'm in shock of all the stupidity and waste of my time.  20 minutes later, no fire truck.  I had to call 911 AGAIN.  I got the same jack-off I originally talked to and told him he transfered me to the wrong people and that I'd been waiting 20 minutes for a fire truck and was glad we weren't dying.  He absolutely sounded surprised that he had transferred me to the wrong number.

In short, I got ahold of the FD, they came, and we found out we had a faulty detector which set them all off.  The policeman who came called 911 from our house to straighten it out and find out WTF was up with the incompetence.  Come to find out, Vonage must think they're God's gift to telephone services, because they established their own emergency transfer service (which was who I talked to) to transfer 911 calls to the state's 911 transfer service to transfer calls to the town's 911 service!!!!!!!!  Basically, it's like calling from a cell phone, even though I'm in my own house!!!!!!!

don't bother saving $$$ w/ vonage.  you're a gonner if you have an emergency!