STYLETHREAD -- LET'S TALK SHOP!

nicoley · Coach

Please Help... Day 2 Updated...

esquiress · Marc Jacobs

oh honey, i hurt for you reading your post but i just know that you will get through this. that you will be fine. please feel free to post whenever you are down, don't worry about rambling or anything. just do whatever you need to do to just make it through the day.

and i know it sounds impossible right now but trust me, it will get easier. i can't say when but i know it will. one day the skies will part and you will be able to breathe again, i promise. until then, just take extra good care of yourself and know we are here for you.

Tati · Chanel

esquiress wrote:

oh honey, i hurt for you reading your post but i just know that you will get through this. that you will be fine. please feel free to post whenever you are down, don't worry about rambling or anything. just do whatever you need to do to just make it through the day.

ditto!

sorry, guys can be such jerks sometimes!

NCshopper · Hermes

Ohhhhhh...I'm so sorry he's being an ass. How disappointing! It sounds to me like you're an extremely thoughtful person who really cares about people and it stinks that this boy didn't reciprocate.

Just do what you can to get through your finals. Maybe just immersing yourself in your school work will distract you a little bit from him.

And esquiress and Tati are right--feel free to post whenever you need to. I find when I'm upset about something it helps just to write about it. It's like it organizes your thoughts.

Anyway, I hope you feel better.

Dizzy · Marc Jacobs

Oh sweetie, I'm so sorry! You will feel better soon, though, I swear. Just focus on finals and forget about him. It's easier said than done, but you can do it! Just hang on. It will get better!

poptart · Coach

I am coming in late on this, but I'm so sorry this is happening to you. Like Esquiress and Tati said, this is so painful, and I feel for you. All you can do is just keep plugging. And post whenever you need to. Hugs!

beachgirl · Kenneth Cole

esquiress wrote:

oh honey, i hurt for you reading your post but i just know that you will get through this. that you will be fine. please feel free to post whenever you are down, don't worry about rambling or anything. just do whatever you need to do to just make it through the day. and i know it sounds impossible right now but trust me, it will get easier. i can't say when but i know it will. one day the skies will part and you will be able to breathe again, i promise. until then, just take extra good care of yourself and know we are here for you.

I second this. We're all here for you, feel free to post whenever you need to. What a jerk! I have moved a lot & I know how hard it can be when you don't know anyone, but, it always seems that it takes about 3 months before I'm comfortable & start meeting people & feeling more at home. So, hang in there & know that in time it will get better, you'll meet fantastic friends, NICE cute boys, and things will start getting better. Hang in there =)

blubirde · Chanel

I'm so sorry! I saw a friend of mine go through something painfully similar (he lived in England too) and that relationship tormented her day in and day out. It's weird because if he would have lived near her, it probably would have been over and done with much more quickly. But because of the distance, there's always this thought that the distance is keeping you apart instead of the actual issues (i.e. that he's a complete and total jerk!).

I hope things get better for you. Just try to constantly stay distracted. Focus on schoolwork as much as possible (I suggest a B&N coffee shop so you have something to distract you when you can't concentrate). Good luck!

cc · Marc Jacobs

Ugh I'm so sorry! Forget the "cut him some slack" advice I gave you before. He's either a jerk or a total flake and you shouldn't have to deal with either one. I know how hard it can be to take your mind off these things but just try to think of how important your school work is and how unimportant this guy is!

Hermione · Kate Spade

hey nicole

i completely completely understand where you are coming from. i am so so there for you as much as i can be despite our distance. i don't know why things like this happen (they still happen to me) but just know (this may sound cliche, but is true) time does heal all. you are obviously a very caring and considerate person and i know that someone as great as you will be able to find someone that appreciates you for the fabulous person you are!

it sounds like your life is a little bit upside down right now what with being in a city where you don't really know anyone. do you like your job? are there people your age there?

maybe you could start a class or something (art or knitting or something you are interested in) or get a fun part time job on weekends to meet people - i know it's really hard to meet people when you don't know a single person ...

nicoley · Coach

Thanks again everyone... It really does help knowing I have all of you supporting me... And of course the therapy of expressing how I feel...

IndieKitten.... Im actually in Grad school for pharmacy... which being in school does make it easier to meet people, however, my class is 120 people, of which 80%girls, and trust me none of the guys are my type. So that being said, we are with the same 120 people 8 hours a day and for the next 3 years, as you can see i have no interaction with other people really outside of my class. Plus.. would be nice to meet someone outside of pharmacy, as pharmacy is my life right now, and its nice to talk about something other than pharmacy! Like say shopping with all my ST friends :)

scarlett · Marc Jacobs

Ouch, I feel for you. I know from experience how hard it can be to move to a new city and not know anyone. It can be a lonely time. But it can also be a liberating and exciting time, too. You can pursue any interest you have and meet some cool new people that way. Does your school have any student organizations? For instance, my grad school has a film club and a student association. I always feel a little shy or weird joining things to meet people but it does work! I am positive there are other people in your program or just in the city you're in who are wishing to make new friends just as badly as you want to. What about asking someone who seems nice in one of your classes to study with you?

About the boy: when you are in a new city and feeling lonely the way you are, the last thing you need is for someone you care about to let you down the way he has. I am so sorry he is turning out to be such a jerk. I think it's terrible that he hasn't returned your calls. I think you would be totally justified in writing him off completely now, and probably better off too.

It *will* be better for you soon, I am sure of it! You are going to make some great new friends and be much happier!

turtledove · Nine West

aw, you poor thing! isn't it funny what guys can make us go through? I know your pain, I also moved away from everyone and got screwed over by a guy. I couldn't believe how much it took over all my thoughts. stupid boys!

just think, you'll meet someone even more amazing and makes you feel so complete, like that country song...he was just a steppingstone till you're with who will make you happy for the rest of your life. You have to go through the sucky guys to truely find that person.