I heard this weekend that this guy I went out with this summer has been trashing me around the law school. Apparently, he's been saying we had something that was just a sex thing. But I started to get too attached and he had to dump me. So he's the big macho guy who bagged me. (I'm supposedly considered one of the hottest girls in school - and people couldnt' figure out what I saw in him when we were dating). So now according to my source, a bunch of people think I'm a slut. And I've only slept with one guy (I made him wait a month and a half too). And I feel like crap. And we really were going on dates and things. We weren't just sleeping together!
I'm so mad. He was just using me the whole time - and he was doing things like complaining that I didnt' call him enough! The jerk even begged me to stay friends with him after he broke up with me (probably b/c he thought he could turn it into a friends w/ benefits thing - um, not!)
Would y'all confront him on this? Has something similar happened to someone else? I am just in shock that this person I thought was so nice was just using me the whole time I knew him. And I am fighting the urge to dump hot coffee on his head.
what a motherf*cking a**hole! i really hope something awful happens to him. i hope his karma bites him in the a**. i hope he gets exactly what he deserves.
but...i wouldn't confront him. if you do, he'll know he's gotten to you and obviously that's what he wants by spreading these vicious lies. because here's the thing sweetie--people will believe what they want to believe. the people who know you and love you would never think such a thing. but the people who don't know you and want to believe the worst won't be swayed if you come out swinging and deny his lies 'til you're blue in the face. the only thing that will come of you confronting him will be more gossip.
so if i were you, i'd walk with my head held high and if anyone asked me about him, i'd say "we dated briefly, he seemed nice. but i guess i was mistaken." end of story.
oh and let me just be the dieter to your lc right now--
This kinda happened to me. Basically I was hooking up with this guy and it turned out he was passing on EXPLICIT details to his entire house of like 20 guys. It was pretty much the worst thing ever. I dealt with it in a really immature, but ultimately satisfying way. I went over to his room to confront him and did so with his door open. It ended up being really embarassing for him and I felt good about standing up for myself. I guess it was not the most refined way of dealing with it, but I think it really worked out well. I would defintely confront him because I think he'll be really embarassed to get caught and be apologetic. And otherwise it would just be driving me crazy.
esquiress said what I wanted to say (only better). Confronting him is giving him too much importance, and such an a** doesn't deserve any of your attention. Do you thing, walk with your head high, raise way above him and don't talk about him unless it is with your closest friends. Esquiress has it right: people will believe what the want to believe.
You know what happened, that is enough.
Oh, yes: he'll be punished, one way or another, some day. Nobody behaves like this and gets away with it!
Thanks y'all - especially for the Dieter quote Esquiress. That's exactly what I needed! I've already realized I was being a pushover all summer anyway. This just illustrates even more that I need to work on myself and toughen up. Live and learn, right?
what a jerk !! i know what you want to do is scream at him in front of every single person he talked trash about you to. but take the unfun, unsatisfying road and do nothing. it's better in the long run.
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I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day. -Frank Sinatra
The cool-headed thing would be to ignore him and just let it go.
This is one of those situations though where I'd just go ape-shit on the guy and really let him know what I thought, because he's clearly in the wrong here. But that's me. I think you should probably just let it go. But it would be quite satisfying to let him have it.
What a jerk!! Sorry you have to go through this!! Like the other ladies said, I wouldn't confront him and just hold your head high, you know the truth!!
Man, what a jerk! And, like I've said on many occasions, what a law school type thing to do. I don't know why the people in law school revert to junior highers but they do. It's sad and pathetic. Honestly the thing to do is just rise above it. You can't control what people say about you. You can only control what you do and how you act. So screw 'em. I can guarantee you that the people who are going to think badly of you aren't worth your concern at all.
He's a jerk and deserves to have something bad happen to him. Don't worry. Karma's a bitch. With excellent shoes (the better for kicking asses with).