I ask because this morning, my BF and I were sleeping peacefully until we heard a knock at the door. BF's bro (BF and his brother are roommates) opens the door and our friends S and his girlfriend C are there.
Both BF and I were pissed off because we were awoken by the commotion that S and C made. BF's bro hung out with them while we were forced to wake up (no way we were sleeping any more...they were purposely making noise). Half an hour later, after we had woken up, they came out and hung out with us, but we were not thrilled (neither of us are morning people). They left soon after, claiming a lame excuse saying that they wanted to get back before it rained (it hasn't rained at all in Southern California...) without explaining why they came over.
BF's bro told us later tonight that S and C didn't call him before they came, so therefore their visit was a surprise. Both of them aren't happy with is, since surprises in general don't sit well with them. I told them that this is one of the most inappropriate and impolite things I have ever witnessed. It always seems like S and C only bother us or hang out with us when it is conveinient for them. They don't take our lives into consideration. Plus I'm not happy about getting an unwanted wakeup call.
What do you think? Am I just being a real bitch about it?
A girlfriend of mine does that a lot. Last time, the house was thrashed. We were cleaning up after a long weekend w/ guests and were looking nasty. Irks me too. And I've told her. She still does it. At least my friend comes over later than yours did. It sounds like maybe your friends got the hint. Hey-- were they drunk?
no, i think you are totally justified. unless you have the kind of repoire with someone where it is established that it's okay to stop by one another's home, i think it's totally rude.
it's the weekend ... they should have more consideration. anytime before noon is too early and even then you should call first. they could have at least called from outside, which would have been rude still, but at least you would have had the chance to say no. so you're not being a bitch -- i would feel the same way.
my boyfriend's friends are always stopping by our house unannounced, but with most of them it's okay b/c it's not a rude time of day, and if they see that we're busy (he works at home), they leave. and i like these people. but there are some i don't like who seem to stop by at rude times, like dinner time, too late at night or if they come in the middle of the day they will try to hang out and bullshit forever as if my bf has nothing better to do. (hello, he's WORKING...)
quote: Originally posted by: Cricket It sounds like maybe your friends got the hint. Hey-- were they drunk?"
Nope, I think they had taken their motorcycle out on a joyride in the morning and probably decided to pop in unannounced since they were in the area.
Admittedly, it was around 1 PM, but BF and I had been up trying to get things done until around 5 AM (many music business people are up real late so we have to be as well) and BF usually needs 8-9 hrs. of sleep. We also work out of his apartment, so I also resent people thinking that we just mess around doing nothing all day and night when in fact we're working.
Oh, I hate this!! You are not out of line at all. People do this to us all the time!! I hate having uninvited guests popping in unannounced. Drives me nuts. And the best part is, they don't even knock half the time. They just walk right in. Grrr. So annoying.
You and your BF and his brother didn't have to let them in. I think that since they came by unannounced, it should have been no ruder of you and your BF to kindly tell them that you were not up for visitors and gone back to bed.
Agree with most of you though that people who do this are very annoying, no matter what time of the day...although if it really were morning, that would be somehow worse. These kinds of people leave you with no choice but to be honest and tell them to always call first to confirm a visit with you.
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I despise it when people do this! It usually happens to be when I'm cleaning the house in my sweats with a mask on my face or when I'm in the bathtub or something. I just stopped answering the door - if they want to see me, they can call first. If you don't call first, don't expect me to be available.
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Okay, I'm going to be the lone voice of dissent here, but what's the big deal? I always want my friends to know they can come over or talk to me anytime they want to. If I'm busy, I'll tell them so. If I'm sleeping, I'll tell them that, too. I've never just shown up at someone's house but I would like to think my friends wouldn't be bugged if I did.
But then, if I'm ready to go to bed at night and friends are still hanging out, I've got no problem telling them I'm going to bed and they can stay there if they want but I'm out.
I guess the way I feel is that I don't want to push my spontaneousness on other people. I am naturally spontaneous but I don't drop by anyone's place unexpectedly, unless it's with my apartment manager who I have the "it's ok to drop by as long as you knock" understanding. People are different and have different habits. I feel that those differences should be respected.
Some guys (like BF and his bro) are just too polite for their own good.
If I hadn't been in my underwear, I would've come out in my frizzy, tangled hair and told them to leave right off the bat.