I remember trying not to wear black to family weddings as a teen, but I honestly can't recall the last time anyone seriously thought of this as a faux pas. I think this is a rule that's losing its potency in the modern age. I see there's definitely some regional preference for the "no black" rule and some regional dismissal of it (such as NYC and Cali).
In fact, some people see black as the best choice for a very elegant special occasion, and what's more special than the wedding of two people you love?
As always it's about what you're comfortable with. I will say that having read all this, if I'm ever attending a wedding in the South, I will wear another color out of respect for the local custom!
Now, there was this one woman who wore off-white to my wedding, which was soooo tacky.
I don't think it's taboo anymore. I see people wearing black at weddings all the time. That said, I don't like it, and I won't wear black to a wedding. I just think it is nicer to be more festive and colorful.
Since this topic just came up on the Lucky forum, I'll do a cut-n-paste of that. In defense of the tacky dresser at my wedding, I feel obligated to mention that she's a dear friend and she's from another country so I don't hold a grudge. I laugh, but I don't hold a grudge. She wore a skintight off-white lacy/crochet minidress, almost see-through. Yeah, it was that bad.
For me, it's all about season, time of day, location, size, formality of the invitation (not foolproof), and what kind of people the bride and groom are (cool and trendy, or kinda conventional, etc.). I'm also in So Cal, so things here are quite a bit more untraditional than in other regions, and wearing black is OK.
About the only time I wouldn't wear black is a summer outdoor daytime wedding - I did wear black silk slacks with a glittery cami and shawl to one, but the couple was fun and even had their dog in the wedding party. Point being: I may not have been 100% correct fashion-wise, but I felt that the outfit was 100% right for that particular occasion.
The one thing I have no patience for is when you don't know what to wear and you don't know the people getting married. You probably have no business going in the first place, but if you have to, anyone in this situation should reach out to the bride, sister of the bride, etc., and ask her what she thinks would be appropriate. It's a great opportunity to send an email and say how much you're looking forward to the big day.
Maven wrote: In California many women wear black to afternoon weddings as well as evening weddings. I prefer not too because I also think that a wedding is a festive occasion. Still, it's a real pain to try and find a decent dress or outfit that fits me and isn't black.
I totally agree w/ this - I feel a wedding is festive and black is worn to funerals, so I don't wear black. Just a personal preference. Yeah black is totally sophisticated, I wear it all the time, but there's so many other colors you can wear!!!
As for BM - I personally (just an opinion) think when a wedding party wears black it's kind of depressing...although I know it's a big trend these days. It just looks very funereal IMO.