STYLETHREAD -- LET'S TALK SHOP!

cat · Marc Jacobs

Older men?

jen · Kate Spade

My parents are 21 years apart and have been married 25 years. I also like older men but it's generally because I dislike teens and those in their early 20's (I'm 20) because I'm not really into partying or sleeping around. Not saying everyone does that but in the college atmosphere, it's common.

JoceyBaby23 · Gucci

I tend to be drawn to men who are distinguished, powerful and charasmatic. This combo usually means they are also older than me. Also in order for me to determine that a man is all of the above, I have to know them and know about them.. a little bit at least.

I rarely see an older man on the street and think... "He's hot."

Collette · Chanel

Ohh I am a total older man junkie. there is just something so sexy about distinguished grey hair. That said I'm 29 and my hunband is 42 so I guess yes I do have a thing for older men!

Claudia · Gucci

I think older men are attractive especially when they have a small beard. But um dating would be a whole different thing. I've never dated anyone way older than me.

Lilykind · Hermes

I'm 20, my BF is 33 and we've been dating for nearly 5 years...so I guess you could say I have always had a thing for older men.

The truth is that I don't like most guys my age and even slightly older (up to mid 20s like most of my co-workers) because I feel like they're so immature. I completely agree with jen's assesment of our age group. Most guys around my age are also generally intimidated by me, especially when people start asking questions about graduating college early...

If I'm just looking at someone on the street, I find that I'm equally attracted to older and younger guys...it's just that I would never date the younger ones.

Becca · Kate Spade

I've always dated older men. I totally agree with Jen and the maturity factor.

travelgirl · Kate Spade

Okay, so who's the oddball that answered that they do not like older men? Well...that would be me. In fact, my husband is a tad younger than me and I like it that way. I like baby-faced guys. My husband is in his thirties but he can throw on a ball cap and still pass for a frat boy. Oh well, think how cute he'll still be when he's fifty!

Kelly · Hermes

Lilykind wrote:

I find that I'm equally attracted to older and younger guys...it's just that I would never date the younger ones.

ditto. I may think someone my age is hot enough physically, but I'll never date someone my age, I don't think. I go on dates with people who are a year or two older, but I never date them more than once or twice because the attraction isn't there. I want to like the guys who are close to my age, and a lot of them are really nice, but I just don't feel anything. I don't know if it's the guys themselves, or if I'm just attracted to older ones. I feel like I must have at thing for older guys if it happens time and time again.

It's weird, because some of my friends are in fact my age (I hang out with one crowd about my age and one significantly older), and I have just as much fun with them as with the older crowd I hang out with. But as much as I want to, I just cannot be attracted to someone who isn't older. With anyone I've dated within a few years of me, I've felt to some extent like I was babysitting him or something, and I can't be attracted to someone that I feel isn't responsible and mature.

Last night I went out with a guy my age. It was just casual, we just watched movies and stuff, so when we were hungry I just suggested that we go to a chili parlor. While there, he blew his straw wrapper at me. I think he thought he was being playful. That was not attractive.

-- Edited by ttara123 at 08:25, 2006-05-18

sephorablue · Marc Jacobs

not as a general rule, but I have several Older Guy crushes on actors & musicians who are my dad's age, and a bunch more who are about 15 years older. I have a ridiculous crush on Alan Rickman and felt vaguely ill when I looked him up on IMDB to discover he is 63. But in real life, the oldest guy I dated was eight years older, and sadly I didn't get any of the maturity benefits because he's one of the most childish men I've ever met.

lynnie · Chanel

i love older men in the movies, professors, sandy cohen types... in fact,i notice them much more than their younger counterparts, but i get kind of creeped out when i think of dating an older guy. in general, i like guys that can teach me things, but are going through the some of the same things as me. so most guys i date are exactly my age, weirdly enough. in fact, of the 6 or 7 guys i've dated, none have been more than a year older. but they aren't immature in any way, i'd say about the same level of maturity as me- goofy and young, but still can have good conversations and want to do something with their life. i've been fairly lucky- i know a lot of boys in early 20s that are LAME.

Lilykind · Hermes

travelgirl wrote:

I like baby-faced guys. My husband is in his thirties but he can throw on a ball cap and still pass for a frat boy. Oh well, think how cute he'll still be when he's fifty!

I guess I should note that my BF, despite being so much older than me, is frequently mistaken for about 24 so no one ever thinks that we look awkward together. I guess the obsessive Abercrombie/Urban/AE/designer jeans buying habit has something to do with it, but he's a total baby face and I wouldn't have it any other way. So he still looks young...he's just more mature inside.

Kitty · Hermes

My boyfriend is older than me and I tend to be attracted to older guys. I don't know if that will always be the case, it just seems that guys my own age (25) are completely idiotic for the most part.

blink · Coach

A really older guy (say more than around 10 years) I was really not attracted to except in rare circumstances. Funny thing is that even though I am now 30, I still have it in my head as if 36 is WAY older than me. I am fine with younger guys though.

gingembre1 · Kate Spade

I've dated men all across the board - from about a year younger than me, to about 15 to 16 years older. One thing I've found: It doesn't really matter how old they are as far as the maturity level goes. Sure, the older ones may be more "mature" in that they have careers, own homes, cars, are financially responsible, etc. But a guy who is 10+ years older than the girl he is dating raises a big red flag for me now. Often these guys have the most issues, are the most emotionally immature... I mean, I look at my male friends, and they won't date girls who are more than 2 or 3 years younger than they are because younger than that and the girls are too immature. Of course this is all a generalization, and I have dated some older men (about 8 yrs older than I), who are mature and who do make the whole older category of men very attractive to me. But the odds of getting one of the incredibly immature ones is pretty high. I also think, if these guys are interested in much younger women, what's going to happen when I start getting wrinkles? Will they look for a new, younger model? My parents are 12 years apart, and it has worked out well for them, but I think I'm still on the fence about younger v. older guys.

NCshopper · Hermes

I've always been more attracted to older guys than to guys my own age. And when I was dating, finding out that a guy was younger (even if it was just a few months) would be a total deal-breaker for me. I think part of it is because I've always been kind of an "old soul" and just have never related well to people my own age, men and women.

KaffeeKlatsch · Marc Jacobs

Not that I'm exactly up for dating again yet...but I have started to establish an idea of 'who' I might date...and five years older than me is the minimum!

mikacat · Coach

JoceyBaby23 wrote:

I tend to be drawn to men who are distinguished, powerful and charasmatic. This combo usually means they are also older than me. Also in order for me to determine that a man is all of the above, I have to know them and know about them.. a little bit at least. I rarely see an older man on the street and think... "He's hot."

You took the thoughts right out of my head on this one!

Currently, I have a crush on an EVP at Pepsi and a VP of another major candy company. Terrible, I know but i get so excited when I get to see either of them at an industry function or they call on me.

Dizzy · Marc Jacobs

gingembre1 wrote:

I've dated men all across the board - from about a year younger than me, to about 15 to 16 years older. One thing I've found: It doesn't really matter how old they are as far as the maturity level goes. Sure, the older ones may be more "mature" in that they have careers, own homes, cars, are financially responsible, etc. But a guy who is 10+ years older than the girl he is dating raises a big red flag for me now. Often these guys have the most issues, are the most emotionally immature... I mean, I look at my male friends, and they won't date girls who are more than 2 or 3 years younger than they are because younger than that and the girls are too immature. Of course this is all a generalization, and I have dated some older men (about 8 yrs older than I), who are mature and who do make the whole older category of men very attractive to me. But the odds of getting one of the incredibly immature ones is pretty high. I also think, if these guys are interested in much younger women, what's going to happen when I start getting wrinkles? Will they look for a new, younger model? My parents are 12 years apart, and it has worked out well for them, but I think I'm still on the fence about younger v. older guys.

I agree completely. I dated a 42 year old when I was 24, (btw, he lied about his age for six months, which should have been an INCREDIBLY huge red flag...) and when I think about why I wanted to date him now, I always remember that line from "Guess Who's Coming to Dinner," when the 20 year old says of her 40 year old boyfriend, "He's terribly important and when we're married I'll be important too..." So I was an idiot and, not surprisingly, he was horribly immature. No one his age WANTED the big ol dummy. Plus, I cannot believe I gave up 18 months of my 20s to have sex with old man body. Young men are HOT. I'm not sleeping with wrinkles and nose hair and halitosis before I have to (when I have absolutely NO other options

)

But that doesn't mean it can't work with different people. Just that maybe a lot of the time it doesn't.