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Post Info TOPIC: (I DID IT)-Resignation help
pollyjean23


Marc Jacobs

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(I DID IT)-Resignation help
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I have decided to resign from my job. I need to arrange a time to meet with my boss to tell her, but I am having trouble figuring out the best way.  I am overthinking this whole process, and my anxiety is building. 

Her office is located 15 miles away from where I work, and I have no reason for being at her office. That means I have to set up an appointment, and I never call meetings with her.

This ickiness is par for the course, as she and I do not have good lines of communication between us.  I have let things get kind of bad (not irreparable or horrible), and I'm not her favorite person in the world right now.

So many questions are swirling.  Should I do it on a Friday? What if she freaks out? What if she starts asking me a bunch of questions?

I'm planning on giving 30 days notice, so that is not a problem. I don't know.  It's like an abusive relationship (I've been extremely unhappy for years), and I--in a classic turn--am feeling timid when it comes to leaving.


-- Edited by pollyjean23 on Friday 1st of October 2010 01:22:42 PM

-- Edited by pollyjean23 on Thursday 7th of October 2010 11:58:08 AM

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greendiamond


Marc Jacobs

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RE: Resignation help
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I would do it on a Friday if possible. And, I'd take a letter of resignation with you too.

She may freak out, but with 30 days notice there isn't anything for her to freak out about. And, her freak out isn't your problem (which is hard to tell yourself somtimes).

If she starts asking a bunch of questions, remember most of them you don't need to answer. I'd either keep repeating whatever reason your are giving her so she realizes she's not going to get far with you, or tell her that she's making you uncomfortable. At this point you will have already quit, and don't work near her, so I would think the ramifications wouldn't be too great.

Resigning is tricky. I don't blame you for getting anxious.

I'm sure that if you reassure her that you'll do everything you can to make the transition easy on her, she'll be sane by Monday.

Good Luck!

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-gd
D


Hermes

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I would just say that you value and appreciate your time spent there, however, you have decided to pursue other opportunities and want to put in your 30 day notice. Just be diplomatic and grateful, regardless of your current relationship with her.

I would do it on a Friday afternoon as well. However, I would have all my things in order ready to leave in the event that she says that she wants you gone that day (I have seen this happen many times, and it often throws the resigning person for a loop, regardless of how indispensable they think they are -- often it's also in an effort to remove a potentially hostile worker in an effort to mitigate damage to company property, files, morale, etc.)

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gossipgirl


Dooney & Bourke

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D wrote:

I would just say that you value and appreciate your time spent there, however, you have decided to pursue other opportunities and want to put in your 30 day notice. Just be diplomatic and grateful, regardless of your current relationship with her.

I would do it on a Friday afternoon as well. However, I would have all my things in order ready to leave in the event that she says that she wants you gone that day (I have seen this happen many times, and it often throws the resigning person for a loop, regardless of how indispensable they think they are -- often it's also in an effort to remove a potentially hostile worker in an effort to mitigate damage to company property, files, morale, etc.)


D hit it perfectly.  Try to end on a good note - it's best to never burn bridges when you leave. 

If you leave graciously, you'll be remembered more fondly and may have a contact you can turn to at some later date/circumstance you never expect. 

Also, I'd agree to be mentally prepared to leave - this DOES happen quite a bit.
 



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Boots


Gucci

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I agree. Do it on a Friday afternoon. And just tell yourself that you will be strictly professional, even if the boss isn't. Remind yourself that you on to bigger and better things.

Good Luck!!!!!!

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NCshopper


Hermes

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Ditto to D--be prepared to leave that day in case she decides she wants you out. Good luck! I hope it all goes well!

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pollyjean23


Marc Jacobs

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UPDATE-Resignation help
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I tried to set an appt with her for today, and she didn't get it because she was out a lot more than what her calendar showed.  She just got in and wanted to know if i want to call her.  I do not want to do this over the phone, so I'm going to suggest other times.

My options are Monday afternoon at the end of the day
or the time before our staff meeting on Wednesday.  Coming for a meeting with her before a staff meeting is a little more natural.

But

Is it sh*tty to resign right before a two-hour-long staff meeting?

-- Edited by pollyjean23 on Friday 1st of October 2010 01:24:38 PM

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Kelly


Hermes

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I think I would do it on the Monday. I think you're right - right before a meeting might not be the best time.

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Gucci

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Kelly wrote:

I think I would do it on the Monday. I think you're right - right before a meeting might not be the best time.


Agreed.  Not only would it throw your boss for a loop (and you want to leave on good terms just "in case") but she could passive agreesively make those 2 hours very uncomfortable for you.


 



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Hermes

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Boots wrote:

Kelly wrote:

I think I would do it on the Monday. I think you're right - right before a meeting might not be the best time.

Agreed.  Not only would it throw your boss for a loop (and you want to leave on good terms just "in case") but she could passive agreesively make those 2 hours very uncomfortable for you.
Ditto--I was just thinking the same thing.  If your relationship with this woman isn't solid, I don't know that I'd trust her to behave herself during the staff meeting.  Would waiting an extra two days screw up any of your plans?  (For example, I assume you have another job lined up--would it screw up your start date if you gave 30 days notice on Wednesday, as opposed to Monday?)

 



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pollyjean23


Marc Jacobs

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I got a meeting scheduled for Thur morning, which I think is a good time. Plus it gives me some more time to prepare what I will say, clean house a bit, and maybe smooth things out a teeny bit.

Thank you everyone! It's gonna be interesting--quitting to go back to school. I'm doing it now in order to allow myself some time to heal and refresh. I stayed in this job (well, really 2 jobs, considering my dual role) about 7 years too long, so I have a ton of work to do.

You all are great!

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Suasoria


Chanel

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I'm so proud of you for doing this!

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pollyjean23


Marc Jacobs

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RE: (I DID IT)-Resignation help
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Okay. Well, it's done!  Thanks for your advice, everyone.  It went well, and it was actually very sad.  I like these people a lot, and I've worked at this place for almost 9 years.  I think this resignation will help me build stronger relationships with some of my co-workers, which is excellent.  Props to DH for helping me practice last night too!  :)



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greendiamond


Marc Jacobs

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Congratulations! I'm sure it feels like a weight has been lifted!!! Good luck with going back to school!

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-gd
Boots


Gucci

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Good for you! I'll bet that's a relief. Now you can get excited about starting a new phase of life!

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