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Post Info TOPIC: UPDATE:


Coach

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Posts: 1590
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Ok he got back from New York a "CHANGED MAN" he is now determined to go to school and now he thinks he should move home to save money on rent and give us a lil break from each other. I hate how guys try to take things into their own hands and switch things about so that it seems like it's their great idea! He thinks everything will be the same and we will have slumber parties at each other's houses and go on date nights and have more mystery and fun in our relationship and in the meantime he can finish school and then we can get back together get married and buy a house etc etc. The only way Isee it ti, he istrying to have his cake and eat it too. I think this seems like a big joke that after three years of living together he can go home and it will still be just fine. I am just going to tell him, I cant do it and I need to have it all or nothing. Right now, I'm leaning toward nothing.



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Chanel

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Based on this and your previous post, I think you should take nothing.  You really seem to have already made up your mind and just b/c he cries change now, doesn't mean that he really will change.  Good luck. Keep us posted.

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Marc Jacobs

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hon, you were right the first time. "I f***ing hate you" is not OK, not even in the middle of a fight. and what he's saying doesn't even make sense--he wants to move out, so you can have a break from each other, and then get married? Married people don't get breaks from living with each other... that's part of the point of being married. So if you guys are having trouble now, what does that say about how things will be if you actually do marry?

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Coach

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Yes, I know... I don't really understand what he is doing either. I feel like it's a game to him and I'm just a pawn. I love him so much but with our trust issues and his past indisgressions, I definitely don't think I could handle him living away from me and I just think that is silly to be in a relay with someone, if that is the circumstance. I am trying to talk myself into it, but I really feel like I'm a beaten down person and so any glimpse of love someone will show me, I go to it. When he's nice and we are having fun times, I don't want to be anywhere but with him and then are the other times, when I just cry. I deserve better!

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~ Leslie


Chanel

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Yes, you do deserve better! I agree with sephorablue. Seriously - he's continuing to try to control you by holding all the cards. Don't let him. Take back your own life. It doesn't mean anything if it's not yours.

Good luck, I know you can do it!

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Coach

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fashionista L wrote:


Yes, I know... I don't really understand what he is doing either. I feel like it's a game to him and I'm just a pawn. I love him so much but with our trust issues and his past indisgressions, I definitely don't think I could handle him living away from me and I just think that is silly to be in a relay with someone, if that is the circumstance. I am trying to talk myself into it, but I really feel like I'm a beaten down person and so any glimpse of love someone will show me, I go to it. When he's nice and we are having fun times, I don't want to be anywhere but with him and then are the other times, when I just cry. I deserve better!


I know exactly how you feel. Letting go of him will be difficult, but you deserve so much better than him. If he really loved you, he would never treat you so badly or make you cry. Just try to be strong and do not give in to him.



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Coach

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Posts: 1764
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fashionista L wrote:


Yes, I know... I don't really understand what he is doing either. I feel like it's a game to him and I'm just a pawn. I love him so much but with our trust issues and his past indisgressions, I definitely don't think I could handle him living away from me and I just think that is silly to be in a relay with someone, if that is the circumstance. I am trying to talk myself into it, but I really feel like I'm a beaten down person and so any glimpse of love someone will show me, I go to it. When he's nice and we are having fun times, I don't want to be anywhere but with him and then are the other times, when I just cry. I deserve better!


I know how you feel,too. I guess I would ask: if you have any doubts, is it worth it to go through all the potential pain again? I think if it were right to be with him, you would know.



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