STYLETHREAD -- LET'S TALK SHOP!

Grace · BCBG

Set up...opinions needed

daiz519 · Dooney & Bourke

I say give it a try by meeting him in person. You never know, you might have a great chemistry in person that you wouldn't have known about over email. Maybe you don't necessarily have to go on a date with him, but have your friend introduce you two in person with a group of people around.

But then it also depends on what sorts of things you've asked him over email that made you feel like you have nothing in common--if he's said things that are non-negotiable for you then maybe it would be wasting time to meet him.

NCshopper · Hermes

I agree w/ Daiz--give it a shot. You may have very little in common on paper, but you may really hit it off. For example, there are a lot of things that my husband and I don't have in common (different backgrounds, raised in different places, different religions, jobs, ages, etc.) but we see the world in a very similar way, have a similar sense of humor, and enjoy doing a lot of stuff together and those are the things you wouldn't necessarily pick up until you met in person, you know? So, I say, give it a shot. You never know.

Grace · BCBG

You both make a very good point. I know I am trying to talk myself out of it a bit too. The idea of having to date again sucks. My fear is getting together and having nothing to talk about.

daiz519 · Dooney & Bourke

I am so feeling your pain, Grace! I hate this awkward dating thing!! And for the longest time I've been single because I've given myself excuses to avoid it, being in grad school, busy schedule, etc. But now I have no excuse AND I don't want to be single forever. So everytime I try to talk myself out of it, I remind myself that I'm not going to get anywhere by sitting at home alone. We might have to go through some awkward silences before we get to something special :)

Grace · BCBG

Avoidance is so much easier, isn't it!

daiz519 · Dooney & Bourke

yes, it is definitely easier! But also lonely :(

jah · Dooney & Bourke

Just remember... "you gotta kiss a lot of frogs to find your prince". It really is a numbers game. Go for it! Good luck.

I avoided being set up with my ex fiance for about 4 months because I didn't think we had anything in common. While we didn't get married because he wasn't "the one", we dated for 4 years and he is still a good friend. Dating him taught me a lot of new things and expanded my interests. So, at the very least, you may make a friend for life outta the deal and expand your horizons!

blubirde · Chanel

Unfortunately to get to the relationship part you have to do the date part. And most dates are never a waste of time. Even if he's not "the guy" or even someone you'd consider dating again, going out there and doing it makes it easier the next time and the next, etc. Plus it helps you decide who and what you're willing to accept.

You should definitely give him a shot. The pros outweigh the cons in this one. If he sucks and you guys don't have anything in common then the worst you can say is that you learned a little something for the next time.

Grace · BCBG

You are all right. You are giving me the motivation I need. I do appreciate it. I'll suck it up and see what happens!

Grace · BCBG

Ok, so I think the joke is on me. We've been emailing for two weeks and he hasn't even mentioned getting together. Maybe I'm just impatient?

jacL · Coach

Grace wrote:

Ok, so I think the joke is on me. We've been emailing for two weeks and he hasn't even mentioned getting together. Maybe I'm just impatient?

I don't know, I would think after two weeks of emailing I would want to get together with someone, but maybe he has the same doubts that you do. I say you should suggest getting together and that way you can see him in person (that sounds scary but, personally, one reason I love email is it allows me to act bolder when I need to) and you may find out you two have more in common than you thought...or that you really don't, but then at least you know and can direct your energies elsewhere.

Metric · Gucci

Meh. In that case I would say forget it, not worth the time and effort.