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Post Info TOPIC: Wow


Chanel

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Girls I know I can talk to you and you all will give me honest opinions. I know when it comes down to it if Chris and I are happy than that is all that matters. Although I value yours and my family opinions. My BF has popped the question...yes marriage. I accpected.   Yes I  know it is sudden but he makes us happy and in the two past marriges(16 years) all I ever wanted was a partner to show me love, take care of me and be a equal partner. Just wanted to add... The marriage to the ex was over for a year before I  filed for a divorce 

-- Edited by small fry at 11:04, 2007-06-19

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Dooney & Bourke

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I had a feeling that was your news. Congrats!

I'm sure this is very exciting and scary for you. Have you told Chris yet? I would definately talk to him about his feelings. I know it isn't solely upon him to make a decision for you, but it will make a huge impact on him, so hopefully he is okay with it.

I hope everything works out for you. You really deserve a great man. biggrin



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Gucci

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I think its great that you have found a wonderful relationship that you can be happy in. You ask for our opinions so here is mine and I don't mean this to be harsh at all.

Yes your marriage may have been over a year before it truly ended, but all of those feelings are still very fresh. Having a wonderful man come into your life and show you all of things you were missing can almost have an over effect of him being more wonderful than he truly is. Kinda like how if you haven't had chocolate cake in forever and you have been wanting it. When you get that first bite it is more wonderful than in reality. If that makes sense. I am NOT in any way discounting the fact that he is great. I just think that it takes time to really get to know a person. In your last post (first of May) you mentioned that you had just met someone and he wasn't pressuring you at all and you were still unsure of your feelings. Is a month's time really enough to know? Are you really yourself around someone after only a month (or even two months)? My thought is, if it is going to work out- why rush it? You have already had two bad marriages so there is no need to rush into another one. Take your time- enjoy the dating part of it.  I would definitely not rush into getting married.  If you do stay engaged, take your time and try to learn more about each other. 

I think that you are the only one who can truly know if he is right for you so good luck with whatever you decide and please do not feel like I am attacking you. I'm just trying to point out the negatives to give you a different perspective. Love can be blinding (the best part!!). =)

-- Edited by HeatherLynn at 14:40, 2007-06-19

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Marc Jacobs

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confused wait, is this the same guy you met a month and a half ago??

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Chanel

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i'm with heatherlynn. :/

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cat


Marc Jacobs

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Congrats on finding someone that you are so happy with,however;I do agree with heatherlynn.
This is just my two cents,and obviously you should use your own judgment in the long run,as you are the only one who really knows your whole situation.
That being said I wouldn't rush into marriage,just enjoy your time with him and let things develop slowly.
I don't mean any insult by this, it's just I used to be the kind of person who rushed from one relationship into another. I'm not saying that is what you are doing,but I only want the best for you and suggest that you take it slow,because in the long run you could end up with what you really need and want(worked for me.)
I wish you happinees in what ever you do.

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Hermes

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Wow, indeed! And congratulations!

I'm thrilled for you that you've found someone who treats you well--you really do deserve it and I'm glad to hear that your life is taking a turn for the better.

Give the engagement some time though. I'd really hate to see you rush into something and later realize that you weren't as compatible as you thought, or he wasn't the person you thought he was. Give it 6 months to a year and then get married. As HeatherLynn said, if it's going to work out, why rush it? There truly is no hurry and I think you'd be better off by waiting a little bit before rushing down the aisle.

After a month of dating someone, it isn't unreasonable to get engaged--sometimes when you know, you just know--but a month of dating someone is a bit early to get married, especially after a divorce and everything that you've gone through. That's a LOT of emotion to process very quickly and you need to give your head and heart time to sort it all out.

Congratulations again, though. Nothing I just wrote should take away from the fact that I'm thrilled you found someone who treats you well. You're a great mom and a great person and you really deserve the best. smile.gif

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Chanel

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Thanks ladies I knew I could count on you all.

HeatherLynn no offense taken, I understand where you are coming from and it makes totally makes sense and nothing that has not went in my head before.

We have decided for Jan for the wedding.  That is 6 months from now but if I need more time that is fine with me too. Thanks for all your support 

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Kate Spade

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NCshopper is right. Wow, indeed.

Congratulations!!

I'm glad you are waiting until January to get married. In the next few months just keep your eyes open to make sure that he and this is what you really want. It will be really easy to get distracted by wedding plans and by the idea of marriage.

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Hermes

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erin wrote:

i'm with heatherlynn. :/






me too. I'm glad you're happy but its so soon and you've been through so much. I would just hate to see you or Chris get hurt.

this is going to show the cynical side of me, and I hope I'm just being paranoid, but DO make sure you pay attention and find out who he really is durign the engagement. I'm not sure I fully trust a guy who pops the question after a month- especially knowing that the woman was just getting over a divorce. You were in a vulnerable position and a lot of men would use that to their advantage. Again, hopefully that isn't the case at all....

-- Edited by ILoveChoo at 19:59, 2007-06-20

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Kate Spade

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Congratulations! I'm with the others, and I just want to say be careful. I hope you know that we just want you and Chris to be happy, and we're not trying to bring you down. I really hope that this will be a long, happy, healthy relationship for the three of you!

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